When it didn’t happen, Corcoran concluded that the exposure of the “news” to his massive audience must have swayed Cardinals GM John Mozeliak from announcing it until Pujols returned from a family trip to Hawaii.

Albert Pujols remains unsigned and is either soaking up rays in Maui or laughing comfortably from his couch in St. Louis.  No one knows, really.  Well apparently, JC Corcoran and his ominous “source” do and they’re sticking to the proclamation that an announcement is coming, well, “soon.”

For hardcore Cardinals fans, those are the details.  That’s it.

As it turns out, the story doesn’t end at JC Corcoran being factually inaccurate.  Allow us to shift our attention away from Albert Pujols’ travel itineraries and on to something deeper.  Namely, the way JC Corcoran handled the criticism and how legacy media members aren’t suited for this industry’s evolution.

First and foremost, JC Corcoran was wrong about his report.

But who cares, really?  The “news” wasn’t even relevant.  Let’s say the probability of Pujols re-signing with the Cardinals is around 60%.  Given his connection to the city, his salary demands and those willing to meet those requirements, that’s probably a conservative estimate.  Is a prediction that hedges on the side of likelihood really that meaningful?  Hardly.  If you’re not going to stick to the specific announcement date that was reported, then why report anything at all?  Oh, right, because throwing piles of dung against the wall with ambitions to gloat about the ones that stick, and ignore the ones that don’t, is revered in this industry.  We forgot.

Now, when you’re publicly incorrect about a topic as resonating as Albert Pujols’ contract status, forthright human beings have the following three options:

(1) Ignore the criticism
(2) Bide time and and politely respond, “Eh, just wait and see.”
(3) Accept responsibility

It’s not hard.  Bernie Miklasz was tremendously and publicly wrong in March about Mizzou hiring Matt Painter away from Purdue.  He accepted it, apologized and everyone moved on.  Then again, he’s an exception; a polite one, if you will.  The following is a collection of responses sent from JC’s Twitter account to readers that questioned the legitimacy of his report over the past week.

Yikes.

In what industry, other than the St. Louis sports media, can someone be so rude, so abrasive, and so pompous to a collective group of existing/potential readers and listeners…and NOT lose their job?  Then again, JC Corcoran has been hired and fired (and then hired again) by nearly every radio station in town.  Another termination only strengthens his résumé.  But currently, JC only has one employer: 550 KTRS.  They seemed comfortable with his brash behavior last year, so we’re guessing his latest performance won’t cause a stink in the KTRS corporate offices.  That negligence is nearly as baffling as the act itself.

Because, it’s not about the curse words.  It’s about a mentality amongst the legacy media that just. doesn’t. fit. with the evolution of the industry.

Consumers are everything today, not the personal agendas of so-called “lightning rod” shock jocks.  Readers, listeners, viewers: they’re everything.  Our readers mean the world to us.  It sounds cliché, trite, and boilerplate, but it’s true.  Interacting with other sports fans is not only part of the job, but it’s probably the best part.  The compliments, the insults, the criticism, and everything in between.  It’s fantastic because people care.  And when you respond politely, no matter how difficult, inconsequential relationships evolve into meaningful ones because people learn about you.  You’re not just a column-writer, radio-voice or media-head anymore.  You become a person, even in the face of disagreement or criticism.

And here’s where JC Corcoran (and a lot of other media members in this town) fall extremely short: they just don’t care about you as a person, so they have little reason to engage.

We’re not sure how or why this became a valuable asset to employers and advertisers in the St. Louis sports media, but it’s a harsh reality of the current industry.  It needs to change.

Since an early age, most classically-trained journalists and broadcasters have been conditioned that their thoughts matter more than the general public’s.  And it’s hard to blame them.  Heck, access to a broadcast microphone or television camera is an exclusive opportunity, and for that reason, it’s also one where power is frequently abused.  For a long time, being a media member was about providing opinion, and never responding to it.  Up until about six years ago, the only way to voice a public opinion (as a fan) was to write a “Sound Off” letter to the St. Louis Post-Dispatch and hope that they printed it in the Sunday paper.

But that was then.  The rules have changed.  You can’t stop social opinion like you can hang up on talk show radio callers.  It’s pervasive and it’s here to stay.  We all have a platform for expression, and it’s no longer limited to JC or any other media member that’s made a career out of pointing down at a collective audience.  These people are slow to adapt new media engagement tools like Twitter and Facebook because they don’t want to admit to themselves that they’re on the same deck as the peasants now.

…it’s why JC has a daily YouTube video entitled, “JC’s Daily Dose“, with no description other than the date it was posted.  After all, it’s JC.  It says so in the title.  That’s all you need to know.  Now watch, dammit.

…it’s why JC can call out the Twitter users that criticized him, despite claiming that he doesn’t read any of the responses.  You know, because he’s far too important to do it himself.  He has an entire staff for mindless drivel like interacting with real people.

…it’s why JC labels the entire internet audience as “basement dwellers“, despite filming a daily show in what appears to be, um, a basement.  But since he leads each show by informing his audience that he lives in Clayton, it’s clear that it’s really expensive basement.

…it’s why JC has a website with collage background featuring all of the celebrities that he’s met.  If you haven’t heard, he’s pretty famous and hangs around other famous people.  A lot.

…and it’s why JC can call readers “douchebags” for criticizing his reports – which, to-date, have zero merit.

Blogs, Twitter, and Facebook; they’re all tools to voice an opinion and we all have access to them.  The recipient can choose to ignore it…or accept it and make yourself better because of it.

Or, tell people to blow themselves.

Either way in this town, apparently.

—–

The following critique revolves around Tony Softli, a former St. Louis Rams employee who now works as an analyst for 101 ESPN and columnist for their digital home at 101Sports.com.  Additionally, he’s known for having the best fake mustache in the business as well as the worst understanding of Twitter this side of the Mississippi.

Let’s take a gander, shall we?

Now, a deeper analysis that’s sure to be used in freshmen Mass Communication classes for the next ten years.

1.) Abuse of the 140-character Count

First and foremost, the tweet above was screencapped at Deck.ly.  Deck.ly aggregates tweets that extend outside the bounds of Twitter’s standard 140-characters.  Thirteen year olds across the world understand these rules and regulations.  Apparently, Mr. Softli does not.

If one was to follow all of the instructions located in the tweet above, they would need to block off an entire Saturday afternoon.

2.) Grammatical errors

Mr. Softli is a frequent abuser of the English language, so we won’t drag him over the coals for the missed possessive apostrophe on “this week’s”.  Then again, he should probably thumb through a copy of Hooked on Phonics, considering he just launched TonySoftli.com.

Eh, forget it.  Grammar and punctuation isn’t essential when you’re only regurgitating Associated Press stories.

3.) Third-person references

Media “predictions”: originality at its finest.  Who’s giving the predictions this time, Mr. Softli?  Oh, Tony Softli?  As in, THE Tony Softli?  You don’t say.

Extra third-person bonus points for creating an entire website named after yourself.  We’ll give Mr. Softli a slight pass on this one because it’s St. Louis sports media; where names sell, not quality content.

4.) Broken links

One of the fifteen tasks that Mr. Softli instructs you to complete is heading over to 101Sports.com, the digital home of 101 ESPN.  At least, we’re guessing that’s what he means.  The actual link posted in his tweet is http://sports.com, an online sports betting website.

Oops.

Although, considering Mr. Softli is also providing expert predictions, maybe he’s suggesting that you throw down 20-bucks or so.

5.) Irregular Capitalization

Sometimes irregular capitalization can draw attention to key words in the middle of a sentence.  Sports.  News.  Got ya.  As if there was any doubt that 101Sports.com delivered sports news.  From the title of the URL, we would have expected a website that reviews dog kennels.

And leave it up to a radio guy to sign-off a tweet like it’s a goddamn pre-recorded advertisement.

6.) Hashtag diarrhea

The first five snafus were unique in their own right, but this particular abnormality might be our favorite.  To catch everyone up to speed, Twitter “hashtags” are denoted by the “#” character and used to group tweets into specific categories.  Readers can click on hashtags to view an aggregation of tweets containing this hashtag.

So, we suppose it makes sense that Mr. Softli tagged this particular tweet with #Rams and #NFL.  But given that they occur after 228 other characters, no one saw them anyway.

But that’s neither here nor there, let’s observe the remaining two hashtags.

This tweet was posted on Friday.  There’s this thing on Twitter called “Follow Friday” where tweeters  name somebody interesting and tag it with a “#FF” hashtag.  That way, other Twitter members can watch the “#FF” and find new, interesting people to follow.  Mr. Softli decided to try and leverage this phenomenon that was popular for roughly 15-minutes, two years ago.  Hey, you never know.  Maybe some kid in Botswana is watching the “#FF” hashtag.  If he is, he just got all the Soflti he can handle.

Now, here’s where it gets really strange.  Mr. Softli also tagged his tweet with #MLB.Hey, you’re one of the three people in the world that is following MLB news…on Twitter…in late November.  Oh, and you also like the NFL?  And more specifically, the Rams?  Get ready, son.  It’s time to blow your mind with 100% Softli.

—–

He booked another solid performance on Sunday night, showing off his wide array of abilities.  He’s like the Jose Oquendo of the local media; the guy can do it all.

—–

Bryan began the show by rattling off the “Star Spangled Banner”.  KSDK producers thought it was odd, but when in doubt, you never challenge patriotism on live television.  That’s a hardened rule that is typically covered in between “fake tans” and “how to create a pun from any athlete name” in broadcasting school.

—–

It was a worthy performance of our country’s national anthem.  But Frank Cusumano would not be shown up, especially in a $4500 suit.  He countered by flinging a pepperoni slice into Burwell’s open mouth.

—–

Most guests consider it irrelevant and weird, but KSDK producers insist that the entire talent staff joins Rene Knott for pronunciation tutorials during commercial breaks.

—–

Bryan tried to show restraint, but he was overly surprised and humiliated when Rene Knott mentioned that goatees are far superior to wispy mustaches.

—–

It startled Frank Cusumano tremendously, but several demographical barriers were beaten down on Sunday night when Burwell rattled off an, “WOO YEAAAAAAAAAA!!” in a touching tribute to “Macho Man” Randy Savage.

—–

In this business, it’s all about being better than the three other guys on camera.  Byran Burwell’s formula is simple: tons of controversy…and randomly pretending that a serial killer is standing behind the opposite end of the news desk.  It always gets another co-host off their game for a few minutes.

—–

Overall, Bryan was pleased with his performance.

—–

While running through his sports report on Channel 5, he frequently references other Italians in the St. Louis sports scene and it’s usually done so without retort.  Tony La Russa, Ryan Theriot, Nick Punto.  Yeah, we get it, Frank.  They’re Italian.  Are you done?  It’s late and we need to round out this newscast with a story about some talented animal at the zoo.

Well, Cindy Preszler and Leisa Zigman were manning (or, womanning) the news desk on Monday night and things got a little randy in the KSDK studios. Frank seemed a little embarrassed, but we know what he was really thinking…

That’s 22 mentions, for those counting at home.

—–

email: matt@joesportsfan.com
tweet: @MattSebek

Sure they had Zip Rzeppa on, but that doesn’t count in our book.

Let’s just say that we’re thinking about getting into Frank Cusumano’s ear to see if he can throw some weight around and get these guys a few minutes to rant…

Dave Duncan
What brings rating more than a pitching coach grunting and staring at his black binder for two minutes while standing in front of a camera? That said, we’ll be captivated when you give us the list of the next previously crappy pitchers you plan on making reclamation projects.

Stan Kroenke
When you talk, Stan we have two requests: 1.) tell us whether the Rams are ever going to threaten to leave St. Louis while under your watch and 2.) make sure your toupee is on straight

Colby Rasmus
The whole Cardinal fan base wants to know what its really like to watch your dad argue with Tony LaRussa

Tony Banks
Frankly, we just were curious what your thoughts were when you watched Kurt Warner take the same team you played on to a Super Bowl

And when the sports version of “I’m Just Sayin’” takes off, we can have one guy on to tell the viewers how it played out in the Nielson Ratings…

Dan Caesar.  Enough said.

—

E-mail: josh@joesportsfan.com
Twitter: @jbacott

“The sports world has been rocked over the past few seasons, when the most trusty multi-player celebration tactic – the high five – was effectively replaced by alternatives such as the fist bump and the “jump n’ bump”.

As a result, I’ve made it my quest – no, my duty – to get people back into high fiving as the standard celebration when the Blues score a goal. 

No one executes it better than me, and you can learn my skills by studying the multiple commercials we show during every single Blues game.  My student in those commercials is Ray Vinson from Vinson Home Mortgage and when we first met, he lacked the accuracy necessary to pull off a first-rate hand slap.  Now look at him executing like a pro…

Now I’m not high fiving this guy because he’s paid me to do it while he blabs about mortgages. I’m high fiving him because not only are we watching the Blues game in suits, but we’ve got a huge bowl of popcorn in front of us, too.  The bottom line is, if you want to properly celebrate sporting events, popcorn, mortgage rates, anything, then toss out a high five to the guy sitting next to you. 

Don’t let Maverick and Goose know that they did it for nothing.

Go out today, find something to celebrate and toss out a high five to a stranger.  Tell them Bernie sent you.”

—
E-mail: josh@joesportsfan.com
Twitter: @jbacott

It’s time to shave off that patch of hair on the front of your head.  It’s a gotsta-go.

At first, we thought it was a tattoo of a hockey puck, but we’ve recently received confirmed that it’s not.

Now, we can’t decide which is more frightening:

- The actual patch of follicle scraps of the top of your noggin’
- The assumption that the head coach of the Blues doesn’t watch game film

In the mirror, this secluded island of fur gives the impression of a thick, lustrous head of hair.  Yet, aerial footage reveals a slightly harsher reality.  Watch the game films, Davis.  It will do wonders for that noggin’….and as an added benefit, perhaps you can figure out why your team can’t hold a 3rd period lead.

It’s a win-win.

—–

email: matt@joesportsfan.com
tweet: @MattSebek

Enter KSDK’s Mike Bush, a seasoned-pro, who went to a commercial break in the 10 pm news by stating, “The Blues have a day off today, but we’ll tell you why a little house-cleaning was necessary”.  As you can see, he looks damn serious about it too.  Pay no attention to Cindy Preszler.  Mike’s new cologne has been making her feel a little loopy.

Mike Bush tells me that the Blues did a little house-cleaning, eh?

Crap.

Did they deal some young, fan-favorites to make room for an established scorer?

Enter Rene Knott, who seamlessly takes another “house-cleaning” joke from Mike Bush…and gladly informs the viewership that the Blues are still in tact.  For now, they’ve acquired some push brooms and a trashcan.

You see, Brad Boyes broke some glass at practice yesterday so literal “house-cleaning” was necessary.

Heh heh, house-cleaning.  They got me.  It’s all about the delivery.

Mike and Rene.

Another sports pun knocked out of the park by St. Louis network news.  Rene was extremely pleased.

——

email: matt@joesportsfan.com
tweet: @MattSebek

If they ever do a sequel to the smash book Moneyball, Zip may be on the short list to solicit for some advice.  Cardinals fans are just hopeful that John Mozeliak was sitting in front of his slingbox in Florida jotting down notes because we don’t want him going cheap or crazy. 

Zip’s advice could be applied not just to baseball but to many things in life – buying Christmas presents, getting your first plate at a buffet, subtly mocking a news segment that should be called “just saying, that we’re doing this as a gimmick without saying anything at all”

And as a bonus, it gave us a valid excuse to pull an old Zippo’s clip on Youtube which may have made it all worthwhile…

—
E-mail: josh@joesportsfan.com
Twitter: @jbacott